If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
