I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
