Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
only you would photoshop your dick
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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