apparently the secret to your success is patron
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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