Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
