He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
your like the ambassador to my penis.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
