i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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