i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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