it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
