I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
