piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
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