i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
