How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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