John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
