Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
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