I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
