I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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