I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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