I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
