Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
