I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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