i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
