I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
