marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
