Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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