She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
