isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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