from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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