dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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