i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
