She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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