u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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