it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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