You're so nebulous sometimes
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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