dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
