google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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