We should be called the Road Head Warriors
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
