So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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