that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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