i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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