Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
