Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
