just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
