Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
