she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize