As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
