I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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