when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
