I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
