did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize