girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I forget how to act sober
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